What’s the big deal about a marriage proposal?  

What’s the big deal about a marriage proposal?  

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There is no doubt about this; every single lady eagerly waits for the day the man of her dreams will propose to her. While the guy has to come up with creative and sometimes outrageous ideas just to ask her to be his wife, the lady will probably be thinking of whether to faint, cry, or bust out in laughter when the proposal comes. LOL

Don’t you just hear some marriage proposal stories and all that comes to your head is “how would my man propose? I know ladies who say “my own proposal has to be out of this world, “Say no to private proposal,” “I want the world to hear about my proposal”

This insistence on the extraordinary puts undue pressure on the men, some of them have not proposed because they are still saving money to buy the ring you want.

Social media is not even helping matters. So much priority has been given to the glamorous and extravagant proposals that some ladies measure the importance of their relationship by the kind of proposal the man pulls off.

Listen, big proposal and extravagant wedding does not guarantee a good marriage. Before you call me bad belle let me say this. I do not have a problem with flamboyant proposals, if he can afford it great, if he cannot please accept what he can offer. Never put your man under pressure because you want a flamboyant proposal.

It has gotten to the extent that when a man proposes privately to his woman, she is not so excited because people were not there to witness the proposal.

Some go to the extent of asking him to do it again. What happened to the ‘you and me’ time?

There is absolutely nothing wrong in having your friends and family at your proposal, I actually find that very honoring but if he does not do it that way would you still love it?

Wouldn’t you rather save the money for an out of this world proposal for your future?

Avoid comparing your relationship with what you see online. Because somebody’s proposal was recorded and posted online yours doesn’t mean yours must follow that pattern.

Some of these desires are borne out of covetousness. When you are not satisfied with what your man can offer and you constantly ask him to look at Mr. B. there is a problem

Godliness with contentment is great gain.

The proposal should be the least of your worries instead, channel all your efforts to preparing yourself for the real deal. Marriage.

Written By

Olayera Oluwaseyifunmi,

Blogger,  teacher, speaker, make-up artiste, voice over artiste and a lover of God.

12 thoughts on “What’s the big deal about a marriage proposal?  

  1. I had told finance how I wanted my proposal to be. I had it imagined in my head and was patiently waiting.(I’m sure you can relate😉😉)
    Alas, we were in the house one day discussing about us , ministry and visions . Right in the middle of the discuss , he got up like something nudged him ,went in , came out , knelt down with the ring .. Said some deep, sincere ,thought provoking and of course emtional words I can’t even remember all (But I remember this one–“will you marry me even with the 8k in my account currently”; -amongst other will you marry me clauses😅)
    What happened to the way I wanted my proposal? My dear , I asked him much later and he said to me… “I didn’t forget but God told me right there and then to propose”.
    That was joy to me. I immediately deleted the “proposal film” I had in my head. I was more than satisfied my father(God) had spoken, and more so that he listened as always. Nothing else mattered! That was how God wanted it.. And that was all that mattered. He was obedient to God yet again. I knew how much he so wanted to give me my own idea of proposal and even more, but when God spoke..he bowed ! An overwhelming joy filled my heart. I dunno /don’t think i woulda had that kinda deep seated joy if I insisted I wanted it my way.
    Happiness and Excitement is NOT the same thing as Joy.

    The journey ahead of you both is more important than the proposal story you desire. Who/what leads or controls your desire is also very important .

  2. Hmmmm lovely.. Well said, but how about we look at it from a different angle? If a lady has been hinting to her boyfriend for a while about her perfect proposal and he decides to do something totally different how do you expect the lady to feel? Personally it’s not even about whether or not it’s elaborate but about the man listening to my needs… If you can’t even honor the kind of proposal I want isn’t there going to be a lot you won’t listen to in future? I mean yes ladies should be realistic in their expectation but a man who loves you should be willing to honor your desire!

    1. Think long and hard about this,
      what is a need?
      What’s more important, the proposal or style thereof?
      You say he’s not honouring your desires, of which there could be other unmentioned things he asks of you that you can’t provide, will you comman break your head? Look at it from his perspective too.

    2. Well yes hez supposed to bt hw abt u also tk a second luk at it dis way, wat if at dat point he doesn’t av d money or jst maybe Dat’s nt God’s plan for u·
      Will U rather follow ur hrt or God’s will or will u wait till he has d money for ur own kinda proposal. Jst saying

  3. We are of the generation where the need to show off every aspect of our lives outweighs the actual purpose for these moments. I thank God for contentment in my life tbh because there’s no pressure to be like/do like others. Only two rules before proposal (when God sends His special son)-Get my dad’s permission and make sure my nails are well done. O tan! (God’s sign off is a no brainer). I’m not particular about how he chooses to go about it. Private/public, no pressure. So many people enter “gbese” because of the need to “tension” on social media. Like someone said, “people spend money they dont have, on things they don’t need, to impress people they don’t like/don’t like them”. Cut your coat according to your cloth. No matter how “mad” your proposal is, the world will only talk about it for a maximum of 1 month. Someone will definitely outdo you. Let’s focus on building a home that will be worth showing off.

  4. Among the many advantages of social media is this disadvantage..the undue pressure it places on people to act perfect.
    To show off and to seek things that don’t necessarily matter

  5. Nice one…am not particularly a fan of d spotlight but I like things being perfect. I will like a proposal I won’t forget no matter how little and he doesn’t have to break a bank.

  6. Word 🙌 Totally support this. The point is that regardless of the “paparazzi” its still the same question you’ll get to be asked.So ladies should focus on the joy of the moment and not the “glamour” of the proposal. 🙋

  7. I personally think the style of proposal should not be dictated by the lady. Aren’t the guys the ones proposing? If he chooses to honor your desires and wants (obviously not a need), that’s cool. If he doesn’t, still cool anyway. It is his proposal… His proposition.. He is the one that gets to do it, so give him a break!! All this fuss about proposals in the recent years is all thanks to social media. Some 10-15 years ago, ring or not.. You will be happy the man even asked you at all. Can we for once focus on weightier matters in relationship and marriage?

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