If you know Virtuous Oak (that’s her name on Instagram) then you would agree with us that her humility and sincerity is remarkable. This month on our Beautified Woman of the Month, we feature this incredible woman and learn from her wealth of experience. Now if you are thinking of going into the ministry or marrying someone in the ministry you need to read every line of this interview more than once. Argghh there’s just so much to learn.
- Please introduce yourself.
I am Adigun Titilope .I have an acronym for my names (given by my parents and my husband) Titilope, Hadassah, Adetola, Didun Adigun. – THADA. I am a daughter of a king, wife of almost 6 years to Dr. Love, mother of three graced nations, pharmacist by profession. My husband and I coordinate a Ministry to teenagers and young adults, MINE TEENAGE MINISTRY and pastor the church arm of the ministry – The Ark.
- In one sentence, how would you describe yourself?
Titilope Adigun is work in progress who is being and doing her best to enjoy the life that Jesus gave her.
- What is your definition of purpose and how did you find yours?
Purpose, the reason for my existence is becoming like Jesus. Scripture says in Romans 8:29 (please read in as many versions as you possibly can for understanding) that I was chosen to conform to the image of Jesus. In my days in the university and a few years later I got really confused because of the wave of discovering purpose. It then occurred to me that since I did not make myself, I would have to ask the One who made me why He did. This scripture just seemed to be it for me with this definition. Being and doing what Jesus would be and do per time and in everything has been my driving force. I have found purpose in being Oluwatimilehin Adigun’s wife, found purpose in being David, Esther and Samuel’s mom and found purpose in being a blessing to the younger generation so they don’t make the same mistakes.
- How would you describe the ideal Christian woman & wife?
The Ideal Christian and wife is one who understands her true identity in God lives by the Word and the Spirit and exudes the love, wisdom, grace of God. She understands she has limitations and that she cannot please everyone so she serves well but also knows how to take good care of herself. I think balance is the word that best summarizes her life!!!
- How are you able to manage your ministry and family without either suffering?
Before I answer this question, I have to say this. Before now I used to say that if I knew that my husband was going to be a pastor, I would have said ‘No’ when he asked me out. I just wanted it cool and steady though there were experiences along my journey through life that were training in disguise for such a time as this.
Managing ministry and family with neither of them suffering was not exactly easy from the start especially because of birthing and nurturing our three great nations. I had to combine this with a 8am -5pm job.
The first thing I did was quit my job, maybe I did not have to but I must confess it was overwhelming and I felt I was being unfair to my children.
One thing God has really helped us to do is build young people and give them a platform to harness and express what God has graced them with so by God’s grace there are responsibilities that can be delegated to some of them and over time they have gotten better at carrying out these responsibilities excellently. With that in place, I have learnt the importance of delegation and monitoring and thankfully these amazing young people are willing to help. God bless them for me. This has helped me focus on family and our children as they are still in their formative years and they need extra care and attention because of the different species of young people in our world.
- Please give some practical tips for women who are overwhelmed by the same situation.
Dear sister let me start by celebrating you for the journey so far. It is a higher calling that you have and I believe God knew your frame before He called you into this thing called ‘ministry’. I know so many young ladies who would say no to being called into ministry especially as a pastors wife . Please know that to a large extent you can not really compare yourself with other women. The demand placed on you is more and on different fronts so my advice to you is :
- Ask God to teach you how to make things work as your peculiarity demands. You need a large dose of wisdom to balance many things.
- With your priorities in place , you will need to define the things that are important, things that are urgent and otherwise. This categorization will vary per time but it will help you plan your time well. Please do all you can to give God first place n your life everyday and keep in touch with Him through out the day, this makes the burden easy to bear
- Please get help!!! By all means I consider myself a hardworking homemaker and in a bid to keep everywhere in shape I get exhausted and don’t get to do some very important things. There are days I’m so drained and irritable and the whole house is under mummy’s tension. My husband tells me that if I continue like this, I would loose out on so many defining moments that would create a lasting impression in the minds of my children . So if you are like me please get help, many times you have people offering to help with different things please allow them to help and get their blessings from God.
- How does it feel being married to a Pastor?
Laughing at this point is so inevitable. Like I said earlier, my desire was to just have my husband and children living in a cute home loving and serving God without too many people around, if you know what I mean.
When this came, my husband took time to break the news of God telling him to start a church because we had even planned that we were not going to do the compulsory classes that would qualify us to be ordained in the Ministry we were attending at the time.
God has worked on me and enlarged my heart to take in more people and to love them. Being a Pastor’s wife has come with mixed feelings for me but the good times far outweigh the not-so good times. I have known the joy of seeing people find a reason to live their best lives. I count it a great honour to have a husband who lives his life loving people and this love has changed countless lives and salvaged destinies. Oh, what a joy to know that the young ones have found shelter from the storm under our roof ,where they can love God, serve Him and give expression to the greatness inside them while preparing to be launched into the world for exploits!!!!!
- Complete this … Pastor Timi is a …
Pastor Timi is a God crazy young man who loves Titilope deeply, amazingly fathers David, Esther and Samuel and who just like Jesus is an expression of God’s love to humanity! An Advocate of Sexual Purity and Love Never Fails.
- What do you love the most about being married?
The best part of being married for me is the knowing that you are greatly treasured by at least one human who has got your back anytime any day, I’m second ONLY to God in his life- such a sweet thought!
- How are you and Pastor Timi raising your children to stand out for Christ in this perverse generation?
What a challenging question. You really cannot imagine how much this means to us because of how perverse this generation and these times are. I believe parents in these coming generations would need a higher level of parenting grace.
That said God has been helping us lay eternal foundations. By God’s grace, they know and attend devotions (we try to make sure they are awake and alert at those times ) and they are in as many spiritual meetings as they can be with us . In between they’ve heard a lot of praying in tongues and they try to do it once in a while.
My husband lays his hands on them (and me) every morning (as much a possible) and pronounces a blessing. Intercession is key for these little ones because prayers cover s them at those times when we can’t be there with them. Very importantly we have been media conscious for them.
I can’t remember anyone of them ever singing a secular song. Guess this might not be a big deal to some parents but I am so grateful that at this age we have a (have a 4 year old King, 2 year old Queen and 8 months old priest) they have an idea of who God is and what worshiping Him means. There is still so much to do in this regard because there are so little alternatives especially in cartoons.
Parenting is one course for us in this marriage institution that my husband and I by the help of the Holy Spirit hope to pass excellently. Let me add that I am also reading books on parenting which I believe would help.
- You are a mentor to many young ladies. Apart from those you have mentioned, can you share any other practical tips young ladies need to live by?
Recently, I have been burdened to tell as many young people, especially ladies that they should seek to know God for themselves, cultivate and carefully nurture a relationship with the first love himself. In my few years of living I have come to know that nothing in this world can ever satisfy. Jesus is the cup that won’t run dry and one of the greatest revelations you can ever have is the revelation of God’s love!!! You need to know that you know that God loves you. Nothing you do wrong will make Him love you less and nothing you do wrong will make you love Him more. Knowing this will help you in the good and not so good times.
Then most importantly building this relationship helps you sharpen your ability to discern with clarity, God’s voice especially (though not exclusively) when it comes to making big life decisions
Secondly, please gain value as much as you can, seek knowledge, read books attend gatherings that make you better. Grab opportunities to learn new things, skills, dishes, etc. we really cannot ignore the possibility of the need to quit a 9-5 job when it becomes inevitable (and many times I think most women are wired to do something we don’t like being idle. ) we don’t just sit at home. At such times the productive things we learn outside the four walls of a school become very handy.
This is very important for ladies who will be in Ministry or married to men in the ministry especially itenery ministers. But you know many times we don’t have the full picture and you will agree with me that it is wiser to learn and not get to use a skill than not being able to deliver. Ignorance is horrible please seek to know all you need to know and become all God created you to be.
Thirdly please prayerfully build friendships. True the world is full of all sorts of people and some people even believe that no one is to be trusted. But there are some amazing people too (just like the scripture talked about a remnant generation) we were made to need people and people need you too.
Find your own friends and be a great friend too. There is so much to say but let me say this finally. Do not fall into the trap of competition and comparison. Just like the Yoruba adage says that the sky is big enough for all birds to fly with it disturbing each other. Please celebrate your uniqueness. Be the best you were created to be.
- What do you love about the Beautified Network?
The Beautified Network is a blessing indeed. I visited the blog sometime in January and I was greatly inspired. I read the interview with the beautified woman of the month, Eziaha and I knew how blessed we are in this generation with amazing women loving Jesus and blessing their world. This is my first interview and I want to say that these questions are really deep I had to search deeply to answer them correctly and I confess that they made me realize things I need to pay attention to. God bless Funto and The Beautified Network Team for this. Greater grace and enlarged sphere of influence in Jesus name. Amen.
- What would you say is your biggest achievement so far and how has it shaped you?
This is one of the most challenging questions in this interview. I’m not sure what to say my biggest achievement is but when I looked at the second part of this question, I will like to say that God has helped me support my husband in the ministry more than my imagination. I really did not know what to expect at the beginning but this journey has built my faith indeed. More than anything else I have grown in my ability to believe God for the impossible.
- What’s your advice for young ladies going into ministry?
Dear lady please know and never forget that you did not call yourself. God called you and He would take care of His ministry. You need to stay with Him for instructions, stay faithful, stay trusting, stay obedient and very importantly stay humble. Ministry is a call to serve God and be a blessing to people. Please be excellent at it. Abide in Him so you can bear much fruits and your fruits can abide.
Thank you! Thank you!! Thank you!!! Thank you to The Beautified Network for this honour.
We think we should be the ones thanking Virtuous Oak for this wealth of wisdom she just shared with us. We don’t even know where to start from. Is it the way she made us see what purpose means from a different point of view. “I have found purpose in being Oluwatimilehin Adigun’s wife, found purpose in being David, Esther and Samuel’s mom and found purpose in being a blessing to the younger generation so they don’t make the same mistakes.”
We think its also important to note what she said about how she and Pastor Timi have been media conscious for their children. By now you should know that no matter how busy you are your family is super important and your children should always be priority, next to God and your husband. What do they watch on TV, what songs do they listen to?
There’s so much more to learn and we think you’d have to be visiting this page regularly to remind yourself of all these salient points.
Thank you so much Ma for this.