Forget what you've been told, motherhood is a full time job!

Forget what you've been told, motherhood is a full time job!


Long before I met my husband, I had this dream of being a “career woman”, climbing steady heights in the corporate world until I got to the peak. But you know how we make plans and they don’t just work out? Yeah, that’s the story of my life. I guess God had other plans for me.

I met the man of my dreams and not too long after, we got married. before I could say “Jack Robinson” my beautiful baby girl was born. (Yeah it was that fast!).

I didn’t let go of my dreams easily, I wanted to get back into the corporate world, I still imagined myself becoming a career woman and nothing was going to stop me so I started my job hunt, I was desperate to get a job, I wanted to do something. I couldn’t stand being ‘jobless’. I was ashamed anytime I was asked ‘so what are you doing’. I felt inferior saying “I’m a stay at home mum.”

When the jobs were not coming, I got another big idea; I was going to start my own business. There was nothing I didn’t try , nothing worked. To say I was frustrated would be underestimating how I felt.

This affected my home in no small measure; I remembered crying every night for God to take away the shame of being a stay at home mum. Surely this could not be my life’s calling I thought. I kept seeing other Eagles (Covenant University alumni) via social media or the television doing great things. Why did God decide to punish me this way?

After trying every other thing unsuccessfully, and having no other choice, I decided to take this ‘motherhood’ thing seriously. Until now, I had cheated my baby; I wasn’t giving her my best. I was not pouring myself into her like a mother should. If at all I was pouring anything it was my complaints and frustrations. I was done complaining or asking God why. I was going to enjoy the ride after all my husband was not even complaining.

Motherhood became my thing, I cared for my family like it was my calling, actually, it is my calling, my primary assignment in life.
Then I got the inspiration to start a blog, I ventured into family, lifestyle, and faith. I shared everyday experiences I got from taking care of my baby and husband.

Not too long after, I noticed readers/followers, people from all over the world loving my content about parenting. People were leaving me comments saying how they could identify and how my posts have been a blessing to them. I was elated, I m not even a renowned blogger neither am I making a cent from it yet but the possibility that someone in faraway San Francisco or China or Dubai or Turkey can be blessed and encouraged to move on just because of a write up by me is the best feeling ever, more rewarding than all the money in the world.

There are things that money cannot buy but are more expensive than silver or gold, the joy of motherhood is one of them. Just seeing my baby smile after a good meal makes me happy.
But how did I get to this point? Just a few years ago, I used to believe that being a mom was nothing special. What is there in breastfeeding a baby in the middle of the night or taking care of your sick child while making sure you don’t ignore your husband?

Now I know better.
Although I have not given up on going back into the office environment, I believe God wanted to use this experience to teach me a lesson. Nothing is more important than my family, they are the priority. I thought my only fulfillment could come from being a career woman God wanted to prove me wrong. He needed to set my mind straight else I may have failed as a mother. Now I think I know better and I’m ready to go into the working environment at least my head is grounded.

I believe God has plans for every one of us far beyond our imagination. All we need to do is let go and let God. What I have learnt just by being a mom is far more than I would have learnt in the cooperate world, from organizational skills, multitasking, to different hacks to save lives. Now in addition to just being a mom; I am a writer/content Creator, climbing towards being a “positive parenting” media influencer.
I plan to make the world a better place by ensuring my primary assignment which is my family is in right standards first with God and then the society.

As a mother my calling is far beyond whatever it is I aspire for myself as a mother I am not only birthing kids I am birthing generations; what becomes of them depends on what I do or do not do with my family. I want to encourage every woman out there aiming for more. Don’t forget your family. It’s sad to see women achieve great feats in career or business while their home is suffering.
Although I still want to be a career woman, I switched my mind to the not my will lord but yours be done” mindset.

Written by:

TosinOpara. I am the content Creator/Brand manager for “Deestylefairy”. I am passionate about family, parenting and personal development, which are the values that my brand represents.

7 thoughts on “Forget what you've been told, motherhood is a full time job!

  1. Great piece! Insightful, brutally honest and a breath of fresh air. I really enjoyed this and look forward to more posts!

  2. I so relate to this. I am at a stage in my life where I feel like there’s nothing I can do and I have applied and applied for jobs but nothing is coming. The world around us makes being a stay at home mum appear dumb. I pray God helps me see His plan for me.

  3. My story is very similar to this. I have always had a job since I graduated school until last year when I had my son. After my maternity leave, I felt I still needed time with him, then I left work to get back when I am comfortable and ready to. Then just when I was about to get back to work, my husband got an opportunity abroad and relocation came. Even though I had always said I wouldn’t mind the idea of being a stay at home mum, lately I began to feel like I was getting bored and like the past one year has been a waste,like my brain has not been functioning. I have had sleepless nights and wet pillows over not working and not been able to do things I was used to. Sometimes God is trying to say something to us totally different from what we want to hear. Fast forward to last week/weekend. Church has been announcing for volunteers to teach the children’s church and when I was approached, I just laughed and said how will I understand these oyinbo children. Then on sunday, my son will not stay in class, he kept crying and when I made him come to the main church, he won’t stop making noise. That was very unlike him. I had to go seat in his class with him and while we were there, I was moved to assist the kids with their paper work. After the service, I felt so great within me and the feeling refreshed me again. I am going to embrace this time and the job of caring for the family( definitely won’t stop my career dreams) and also going to volunteer to teach the children in church. I am sorry this comment is so long, the article really gave me some confidence again. Thank you so much for this.

  4. hmmm God bless you dear for sharing . Some folks can make “stay at home mums” feel worthless i’ve been there many times but it doesn’t get to me anymore .
    We are all special in the sight of God working mums/stay at home mums. May God help us walk continually in the Grace He has provided for us.

  5. Great piece, I was blessed. The society will continue to rut when mothers constantly leave their children to the mercy of maids, nannies, and creche. The child care services are essential but many mothers do not even have the time and the strength to monitor because of the lack of flexibility. It’s tough, I currently work and I have a baby. I pray that every dissatisfied mother will find wisdom to create abundance, flexibility and a fulfilling career path .

Comments are closed.

Comments are closed.
Please wait...

Join The Beautified Network!

Hello Beautified Woman! Join our Network and be the first to know once we have a new post up. Enter your email address and name below.